Where your real friends at…Where your real friends at??? -Drake


BEWARE: A Scattered Mind


Ever spoke to someone who changed the subject every 5 minutes. Don’t worry its a southern thing. If I call anyone in my family from South Carolina, they will talk for 2 hours about something and nothing, and everything in between. So this morning that’s how my blog will go. Not purposely planned of course. I was just going to upload this picture with a Nike caption “Just Do It,” then my mind started wandering…

I only wear Nike to the gym. I have tried off brands, and there is always something I don’t like I’m a very indecisive shopper. But once I know what I like I stick to it.

At Brueggers bagels it took me 10 minutes to order the perfect combination. Cinnamon sugar bagel with honey walnut cream cheese AND cheese jalapeño bagel with jalapeno cream cheese. The reason I order two extremely different taste is because once I leave the store I might change my mind.

Sometimes at work I change my dress three times throughout the day but now that I live at a hotel, I can’t afford to have multiple delicate dresses washed daily.

I guess now I should mention I’m back at Blush due to guarantee consistent flow of mula and Jersey being ass. So I’m staying in Pittsburgh til I reach my goal of a decent amount of money. Then I’m getting some expensive California sun.

Just waking up for work. Like any other 9 to 5, you just do it. You wake up, you say a prayer, then you hustle. For me, I wake up, write a blog, do my makeup, tell my reflection in the mirror that I have a choice to be beautiful inside and out today, say a prayer, then head to work.

Anyway I haven’t been writing because I am starting to have a more depth personal life and I don’t know how much I want to really share… but I do want to share how I feel about it. So bear with me… and enjoy a southern written blog. 🙂

Twerk Team


Contrary to ignorant belief, you don’t need to twerk or even do a good booty shake to make money as a stripper. You don’t have to look like trash or behave ratchet. It actually helps to have some class. Come off cheap, you get paid cheap. You just have to complete someones fantasy woman. Like not twerking at a bus stop, and showing off what martinis can do. But that’s what me and my mermaid did to cheer up from a lame day at work. Just thought I’d share our childish ways.

Friendlier Days

Before I left Pittsburgh, I thought it would be easy to take the challenge of being more sociable. I think I expressed I would try on a previous blog.

So I started replying to everyone I lost contact with, either because of stress or being plain antisocial. Which was crazy because I’m not used to my phone vibrating all day.

I hung out with “my mermaid” many times last week. Wea lot of bar hopping, dinner, twerking at bus stops, and I watched her hula hoop dance performance. My mermaid is a stripper who makes me feel alive when we get drunk at the club. She has a huge mermaid tattoo, gets drunk like a fish and still maintains her beauty which is why I call her “my mermaid.”

Then I met a nice customer who read my blog and then returned to the club and made me look in the mirror. Apparently I didn’t like what I saw. When I look in the mirror I see half a person. Sometimes its the half that thinks life is too short. Sometimes its the half that thinks life is too damn long. Giving him my blog and email was my way of opening up. I didn’t expect him to come back but he did, so I opened up some more lol. Anyway, he made me feel like I could be missing opportunities and positive life connections. Thank you Johnnie! 😉

Lastly, I met someone at the club, who made me feel a sweet peace and reminded me of when I used to laugh and stay “lunchin” (definition below) back in Maryland. Back when I could breathe underwater, and still see the sun shine through many troubling situations. Anyway I gave him my instagram @miniblackbarbie, and we talk an hour every day ever since. This is new for me but I like it. And I’m very comfortable and look forward to this hour. I was initially comfortable because I honestly didn’t think I was coming back to Pittsburgh for a while. Now that I am, I’m a little nervous.

Its like that moment your fighting or debating someone on Facebook then see them in person. Revealing the face behind the voice. In my case revealing the person behind the fantasy. But he doesn’t see me as a fantasy. He sees me as a nice girl. Maybe one day, we can become the definition of a friend.

*Lunchin adv. synonym to silly, funny, crazy, dumb, wrong, careless, etc. (slang originally from metropolitan Washington d.c.)

Review: Atlantic City, NJ


So Atlantic city sucked. I didn’t know the strip clubs weren’t for the casino crowd. The casino crowd NEVER left the casino. Everybody looked like money, too bad not my money.

I only checked out the Bare Exposure club on Pacific Ave while in Atlantic City. The club was just as cold as the beach. Four young cheap idiots came in. Cheap because when I danced, they whistled and didn’t pay me. Idiots because they were talking to other dancers like they were at a house party. This club didn’t serve alcohol but allowed you to BYOB (Bring Your Own Beer), so I kinda understand how they can get that impression. The girls weren’t aggressive or carrying that these guys were wasting their time. They actually looked happy to have some company. Well, I’m happy to have unpaid company. That is a no-no. I’m always focused on the money and can only relax when I have reached my goal. Even after that, I still try to make more. I could tell these strippers didn’t average well on weekdays. I like to average at least $400 a day. I know the economy is bad but if people can make it to the slots, they can make it to the strip club.  All of a sudden, thoughts of what a stereotyped stripper came to me. And at that moment, I was surrounded by them. Mist believe strippers are poor. They believe a stripper should be happy to go home with $150. Hooray right? No. Most people, especially woman believe the average stripper are people who can’t become employed, take drugs, or just prostitutes. Not to put them beauties down, but I’m not your average stripper. I gave up my nursing job because stripping bank more than a 9 to 5 is willing to pay.

That being said, I can’t stay here. $pp150 would be my daily expenses since I’m living in a hotel, so I wouldn’t make a true profit. Hustling hard, and hustling smart are two different things.
So I’m going back to Pittsburgh where I can hustle smart. Until I am ready to try again. Yes this trip was discouraging but I will try again. The search for the money is not over. To be continued…