Before I left Pittsburgh, I thought it would be easy to take the challenge of being more sociable. I think I expressed I would try on a previous blog.
So I started replying to everyone I lost contact with, either because of stress or being plain antisocial. Which was crazy because I’m not used to my phone vibrating all day.
I hung out with “my mermaid” many times last week. Wea lot of bar hopping, dinner, twerking at bus stops, and I watched her hula hoop dance performance. My mermaid is a stripper who makes me feel alive when we get drunk at the club. She has a huge mermaid tattoo, gets drunk like a fish and still maintains her beauty which is why I call her “my mermaid.”
Then I met a nice customer who read my blog and then returned to the club and made me look in the mirror. Apparently I didn’t like what I saw. When I look in the mirror I see half a person. Sometimes its the half that thinks life is too short. Sometimes its the half that thinks life is too damn long. Giving him my blog and email was my way of opening up. I didn’t expect him to come back but he did, so I opened up some more lol. Anyway, he made me feel like I could be missing opportunities and positive life connections. Thank you Johnnie! 😉
Lastly, I met someone at the club, who made me feel a sweet peace and reminded me of when I used to laugh and stay “lunchin” (definition below) back in Maryland. Back when I could breathe underwater, and still see the sun shine through many troubling situations. Anyway I gave him my instagram @miniblackbarbie, and we talk an hour every day ever since. This is new for me but I like it. And I’m very comfortable and look forward to this hour. I was initially comfortable because I honestly didn’t think I was coming back to Pittsburgh for a while. Now that I am, I’m a little nervous.
Its like that moment your fighting or debating someone on Facebook then see them in person. Revealing the face behind the voice. In my case revealing the person behind the fantasy. But he doesn’t see me as a fantasy. He sees me as a nice girl. Maybe one day, we can become the definition of a friend.
*Lunchin adv. synonym to silly, funny, crazy, dumb, wrong, careless, etc. (slang originally from metropolitan Washington d.c.)